Communication is certainly easier when we use words. But that’s not the whole story.
My youngest son is 5 years old, and very sweet (sometimes). He was in speech therapy, and while he’s progressing well, some sounds are still problematic
A few months ago, he was telling us about the “sees.” This is when the verbal charades started.
Son: Hey guys, did you see the sees?
Wife: The seas?
Son: No, the sees
Me: The keys to the car?
Son: No, No, NO…THE SEES!
Wife: The cheese?
Wife: I am sorry, son. We don’t understand.
Son: (Exasperated sigh) You know, the sees were blowin’ in da wind when it was wainin’.
My wife and I simultaneously: Oh, the trees!
Son: Yes, that’s what I have been sa-ying!
When communication fails, we are left feeling as frustrated as he was.
Just for fun...
So, what are we communicating?
As another imperfect parent, I am going to be vulnerable with you guys for a moment.
Two of my biggest downfalls in communication with my kids are:
What this communicates: It minimizes my kid’s effort. They don’t “always” leave their toys in the hall. Maybe often, but not always. Overstating is discouraging.
What this communicates: “I think you are being ridiculous.” My son feels hurt and degraded again.
So, if you don’t think I’m a monster, I want to share 9 helpful considerations in communication that make my bonds with my children stronger.
If you have questions or comments, please leave them below. I promise to respond.
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